Indiana Winter Jokes

By: Jeff Foxworthy

• If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Indiana.
• If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Indiana.
• If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Indiana.
• If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Indiana.
• If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Muncie for the weekend, you may live in Indiana.
• If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Indiana.
• If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Indiana.
• If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Indiana.
• If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Indiana.
• If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Indiana.
• If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Indiana.
• If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Indiana.
• If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Indiana.
• If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Indiana.
• If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Indiana.
• If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Indiana.
• If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Indiana.
• If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Indiana friends & others, you definitely live in Indiana.

These are pretty much accurate for Michigan too...
Is it Spring yet?
Grrr.....

Family

Olan Mills or Dad's Photography? ...you decide

Ginger Dog

My Parent's dog Ginger LOVES when Ryan comes to visit. Pretty much wherever Ryan is, Ginger is sitting on him.

Isla

5-week old Isla was pretty much the life of the party this weekend. Ryan looked at her like this a lot - and quickly determined that we will need a little swing for our baby too.

Joel and Sarah are doing great living up in Boyne and doing all the lawyer-type things that lawyers do. We're all so proud of them.

Luke and Lindsey's cat is hilarious. This is sorta like the manger scene, with all the animals gathered around the new baby.

Luke and Lindsey are such great little parents. Isla is a lucky little girl to have such an awesome mom and dad. Thanks for an awesome weekend guys! We love you!

The Boards

Ryan takes step 3 of the board exams today and tomorrow - so if you think if it, pray that he'll remember everything he needs to remember! Pretty much this exam is a total recall of everything he's learned for the last 5.5 years since his first day of med school.

Golden Gifts

"Thank you for being a friend" necklace is pretty much the best Christmas gift idea I've ever seen in my entire life! If you don't know what to get me...this is it.

Cross Country Skiing

We spent the weekend in Cadillac with some of our best friends Joel & Sarah and Luke & Lindsey and thier new 5 week-old baby Isla. I'll post more pictures of Isla later. Here are a few from the trail.

Isla came along for the skiing adventure, tucked safely away inside Lindsey's coat. So cute!

Aaron and Tracy are ENGAGED!!!

My little brother is in looooooooove! This lovely lady is Tracy. We love her already and are so excited that she's joining the Beeson Family!!

Shredded Wheat

this morning I was eating a bowl of Frosted Mini-Wheats when all of a sudden, out of nowhere this huge sneeze came right before I had time to swallow...

...and that's the story of how I got shredded wheat on my face.

Thanksmas

The annual Beeson Family Pheasant Hunt was a great success this year. Ryan, Aaron, John and Dad were the hunters. Mom, Angela and I were there for support. We got a lot of great pictures, including these ones of Ryan which prove he could be a Field & Stream catalog model if this whole medical profession thing doesn't work out.

PHIL is ENGAGED!

My cousin Phil is brilliant - mostly because he asked Lauren to be his bride. I have only spent a couple of days with Lauren, but I can tell that she is awesome! Welcome to the Beeson family Lauren!

Thankfulness

And now, for your viewing pleasure I present the worst Thanksgiving clip art ever created!!










Today, I'm thankful for:

• Salvation - The greatest gift of all!
  
• Love - Ryan, my best friend and companion, loves me for all the ridiculousness that is me, is brilliant and more dedicated than anyone I know and he loves Jesus
• Family - I have 2 incredible, supportive, encouraging, amazing families full of parents and brothers and sisters who are making great decisions and following Jesus.
• Babies - I'm thankful for all babies, but especially for this tiny avocado-size baby growing inside of me. I can't explain the love I have for my baby already.
  
• Health - It's a miracle that bodies can work right. Mine pretty much works right most days and for that I am thankful.
  
• Safety - Christians all over the world are being killed every day. My heart is especially heavy for India this week. Hindu extremist groups are offering money, food and alcohol to anyone who murders Christians and destroys their homes. The going price for killing a pastor is $250. To read more about this click HERE.
• You! I'm thankful for you! I'm thankful for this really neat online community, the blogosphere. I feel connected to you, the readers, those who leave comments and even the lurkers.
  

Happy Thanksgiving!!

"I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High."
Psalm 7:17

Kisses

Whenever Ryan comes home from work he kisses my face. Recently he was kissing my face and he said, "Your skin is so soft..." then a few seconds later in all honesty he said, "I hear that's a nice thing to say to pregnant ladies."

Do They See Jesus in Me?

Is the face that I see in the mirror
the one I want others to see
Do I show in the way that I walk in my life
The love that You've given to me
My heart's desire is to be like You
In all that I do, all I am

Do they see Jesus In Me
Do they recognize Your face
Do I communicate Your love, and Your grace
Do I reflect who You are
In the way I choose to be
Do they see Jesus In Me

It's amazing that you'd ever use me
But use me the way You will
Help me to hold out a heart of
compassionate grace
A heart that You're spirit fills
May I show forgiveness and mercy
The same way You've shown it to me

Now I want to show all the world who You are
The reason I live and breathe
So You'll be the One that they see
When they see me

Author Unknown

Metamucil

Ryan is a huge advocate for fiber. I think it started in med school when he saw what can happen to your insides if you don't get enough fiber in your diet.

We had Christopher and a few of his friends from college over for dinner on Thursday. At the end of the night, after eating lots of tacos, Ryan offered each of them a huge glass of metamucil and told them they would thank him later.

Needless to say, they followed Ryan's advice and seemed to enjoy the challenge.

On Nauseousness

Here is a quick list of some things that have made me nauseous/sick in the last few months:

• while driving, if I looked in the rear view mirror then back at the road it was not good
• scrolling my computer screen too fast
• being vertical for any amount of time
• smelling anything
• eating anything other than cheerios, pickles or cottage cheese
• rolling over in my sleep
• taking a shower
• walking around

I think I'm getting a little better now...day by day. This tiny fetus is wearing me out! Ryan has been so patient with my sleeping/napping/being horizontal schedule lately. I just keep believing that one of these mornings I'll wake up feeling AWESOME, full of ENERGY and ready to have a lot of fun! Yahoo! Until then, I'll be here...on the couch.

WE'RE HAVING A BABY!!!!

We've got an active one! During the ultrasound yesterday there was a lot of squirming, leg stretching and tiny arm reaching going on. I think the head size is a good indication that this baby will have Ryan's smarts.

We are too excited to function and feel blessed beyond measure by this little one already! June 8th can't come fast enough!

McCain Girl

This 14 year old makes me proud. She is brave and smart and I like her.

So just before the election, Catherine consulted with her history teacher, then bravely wore a unique T-shirt to school and recorded the comments of teachers and students in her journal. The T-shirt bore the simple yet quite subversive words drawn with a red marker:

"McCain Girl."

"I was just really curious how they'd react to something that different, because a lot of people at my school wore Obama shirts and they are big Obama supporters," Catherine told us. "I just really wanted to see what their reaction would be."

Immediately, Catherine learned she was stupid for wearing a shirt with Republican John McCain's name. Not merely stupid. Very stupid.

"People were upset. But they started saying things, calling me very stupid, telling me my shirt was stupid and I shouldn't be wearing it," Catherine said...

Read the story from this morning's Chicago Tribune HERE

Baby Controls the Crowd

Winter is here. dang.

I woke up yesterday morning and my car was covered in snow...luckily I haven't put my scraper in the car yet, so I had to use my sleeve to dust off the car. I was a "dirty sleeve" all day at work.

Martin Sexton

Last night Ryan and I met up with our dear friends Sandy and Greg for dinner and a concert in Ann Arbor. I lived with Sandy in college - and we always have the best time together, so I had been looking forward to it for MONTHS! We met them at the Prickly Pear, a southwest grill type of place. Ryan ordered the best swordfish fajitas of his life, and he savored every bite. We ran into Tom and Marlene Schraw (Joel's mom and dad) who happened to be sitting in the booth next to ours at the Prickly Pear and happened to be on their way to the Martin Sexton concert. Hilarious! We see them everywhere and Ryan always says "Is that Tom Schraw?" in a funny voice, and then it always IS Tom Schraw. We stood in line in the snow for awhile...then threw some elbows to get some great seats a couple rows back from the stage. Somehow we later discovered that those seats were reserved for the Murphy family, who showed up after the opening act had already begun. So we had to move...but the Murphy's also happened to have 4 reserved seats in row D, which were even better than the seats we had to move out of, so we were pretty happy. The Ark is an awesome place to watch a concert! It's a small venue and last night the crowd was really participating a lot, even Sandy shouted out her song request. Some guy behind us was dressed as a wizard, which was odd, and another guy barked like a dog a couple of times...which was also odd. We laughed a lot - The only things on stage were Martin Sexton, his guitar and two different microphones - one normal mic and one echoey one that did some cool reverb stuff.

Martin Sexton is seriously amazing. He has a voice that can do anything! In addition to being an incredible song writer, he has incredible range and variety in what his voice can do. One second he is belting it out at the top of his lungs and the next he is really quiet and clear. It's amazing! If you've never heard him, download him on iTunes, if you've heard him but have never seen him, go to a concert. Seeing him live was awesome!

Yesterday was a great day!

• We woke up and the snowflakes were flying


• Gas is $1.99


• We sat with our friends Sean and Kelli at church


• Ryan ran over a cone in the church parking lot - and just kept on trucking


• We recycled our cans and bottles and got $6 off our groceries


• We ate Doritos


• I took a nap


• Ryan worked on his presentation and got a lot done


• We laughed while we watched Best Week Ever on VH1


• We went to a concert in Ann Arbor with Sandy and Greg


• We saw Chesh (short for cheshire) a friendly kitty that lives somewhere near our apartment and likes to come say hello a lot. We don't know his real name...but Chesh fits.

Hope College - Shut Down - Virus Outbreak

Noro Virus shuts down Hope Campus

• Joe LaFurgey

HOLLAND, Mich. (WOOD) - Ottawa County Health officials shut down the Hope College Campus after an outbreak that's being described as noro-like virus.

The campus health clinic noticed the beginning of the out break earlier this week. Diarrhea, nausea, vomiting all point to the highly contagious norovirus, or something very similar.

As the number of patients went over 120, County Health officials ordered the campus shut down.

Health officials are calling it The Perfect Storm, thousands of students trying to avoid a highly contagious virus.

Read the entire article HERE

Chris and all his Hope friends came over to our house to say "hello" since they were sent away from campus and classes for Monday got canceled.

which reminds me...I need to go buy some Lysol.

Water Painter

I wish I could paint with water like this guy!

VOTE!

Starbucks, Krispy Kreme, and Ben n' Jerry's are honoring election day by giving away free products to people who somehow have enough time to stand in a voting line for four hours then brave a Starbucks madhouse to save $1 on a product they can purchase easily any other day of the year.

Ryan and I did "absentee voting" on Saturday to avoid the madhouse today...I should have saved my "I Voted" sticker!

Companies give free coffee, ice cream for election

By EMILY FREDRIX – 13 hours ago

MILWAUKEE (AP) — Americans will pick a new leader for the country on Tuesday, and will be able to pick up some free coffee, ice cream and other goodies too.

Starbucks Corp. is offering a free cup of brewed coffee to anyone who asks on Tuesday, while Krispy Kreme Doughnuts Inc. is giving away star-shaped doughnuts. Ice cream maker Ben and Jerry's is offering a free scoop as part of a celebration of the election.

Seattle-based Starbucks had originally planned to give away the "tall" brewed coffees to anyone who reported that they voted, saying in an ad: "If you care enough to vote, we care enough to give you a free cup of coffee."

The company broadened its offer to all customers to ensure it was in compliance with election law, spokeswoman Tara Darrow said Monday evening.

"We hope there is a record turnout on Tuesday and look forward to celebrating with our customers over a great cup of coffee," she said in a statement.

Ben and Jerry's, meanwhile, will be giving a free scoop to each customer at its shops from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. on Tuesday.

The company said in a statement it had planned to give free scoops only to people who voted but learned that certain laws may not allow it. Instead, it's celebrating the election with a "national party," said Walt Freese, Ben and Jerry's chief euphoria officer.

"Even though we're giving scoops away to everyone, regardless of whether they vote or not, we hope they still take part in their civic duty," Freese said.

Krispy Kreme is giving star-shaped doughnuts with red, white and blue sprinkles to anyone who mentions the promotion, said spokeswoman Ayana Hernandez, but they won't be required to show an "I voted" sticker.

The company's 85 company-owned stores will be participating, along with an unknown number of its 145 franchisees, she said. Krispy Kreme estimates it'll give away about 200,000 of the doughnuts.

"It's just another way to give customers a free doughnut," Hernandez said. "It's not in any way tied to you have to be a member of a certain party, political party or anything like that."

MORE HERE

Hot Sheets

Some recent comments on a recent post have led me to believe that perhaps it's time for me to crack open the window and give you a peek into our marriage for just a sec.

Early in our marriage I learned very quickly that Ryan is very particular about many things. "Atmosphere" at restaurants, hotels, our home...and especially the bedroom is one of those things. There are certain conditions that must be in place for Ryan to sleep soundly and happily...and one of those conditions is crisp cold sheets. I discovered this in two ways:

1. During med school when Ryan was staying up late to study for the board exams I would head to bed early to get some reading in before Ryan came to bed. The lamp was on his side of the bed, so of course, I just layed there are read for an hour or so. Ryan got into bed and was immediately aware of the fact that his side of the bed was warm (which it was) as if someone had been laying on it (which I had). Ryan went back out to study for another hour and nicely asked me to not warm up his side of the bed anymore.


2. On another occasion, I was startled awake in the middle of the night by the sound of Ryan ramming and thrashing around, tugging at the sheets, throwing blankets on the floor, opening windows, closing vents, etc. You see, the sheets were too warm and Ryan was so uncomfortable that we literally got out of bed and changed the sheets so he could get back to sleep.

Marriage is hilarious. Ryan is hilarious. I love him.

Why the picture of the leaf blower, you ask? Well, because Ryan is really particular, which makes him really good at tasks like that!

Winter is just around the corner....

... so it might be a good idea to print out these tips and tape them to the dash in your car.

"When being pulled out of a ditch, do not drive immediately back into the ditch."

HT: BoingBoing

On wasting a perfectly good box of brownie mix...

A certain skinny, healthy friend of mine recently told me about delicious and nutritious black bean brownies. She said they are "So good, so fudgey and high in protein so they're good for you!"

Of course, I was intrigued so I decided to give it a try - I had simple instructions: instead of adding eggs and water to the brownie mix, simply dump in a can of black beans, stir and bake as usual.

21 minutes later I was totally grossed out! They were very beany...and you're not going to believe this, but I was really truly surprised! Maybe I should have pureed the beans first.

Seriously, not good people...not good.

If you google "black bean brownies" there are tons of people out there (Kelli) who apparently really love these crazy treats.

Give it a try and see for yourself. Personally, I think they're nasty nast!

Night Shift = angry arm shaking fist in air

Since October 1 Ryan has been working the night shift. He has been going to work at 7pm and getting home a little after 7am each day. I don't want to be a complaining resident's wife, but seriously, it has been the hardest two-weeks of schedule I can remeber in the last 4 years!

Here's what a typical day looked like for the last 2 weeks. I would wake up in the morning, get in the shower and hope that Ryan will get home early enough for me to see him before I go to work. He would get home, go to bed and sleep until I get home from work around 5:30 or 6pm to wake him up for dinner. His stomach was confused like he should be eating breakfast instead of lasagna, but its dinner time! We would eat, then he showers and goes back to work by 7pm.

We never made our bed for or two weeks because one of us was always in it!!

Praise the Lord Night Shift is over and Swing Shift begins - which means that for the next two weeks we can actually sleep in the same bed at the same time! He will go to work around 10am and work until 8pm...except tonight it's 9:30pm and he still isn't home because he had some late admissions he had to take care of.

I am so proud of Ry, he is working his tail off in residency right now and is doing an incredible job. For the sake of his sanity and mine...I can't wait for this rotation to be over!

Oh, Jerry...

I came home from work to discover the light on our home answering machine blinking...

"Hi! This is Kara from the Jerry Springer Show! Someone called us from this number and we were just calling back to see if you, your friends or family had any interesting stories or feuds you'd like to put on the show. Give me a call back with the story and you could be on the Jerry Springer show!"

1. Not too sure that someone in our home (myself and Ryan being the only options) called Jerry Springer with a story idea for the show.
2. Really? Kara, how much do you get paid to call random people asking for crazy family feud stories?
3. Did anyone else get called by the Jerry Springer Show lately?
   

ICYMI - 7 Yr. Old Break Dancer On Ellen @ Yahoo! Video

Chicago Marathon

The whole fam went to Chicago this weekend for three reasons:

1. It was our chance to finally meet this wonderful woman, Tracy who seems to be making my brother really happy.
   
2. To cheer Tracy on as she ran her 2nd Marathon.
   
3. And last but not least, just to be together, spending time with family, laughing, telling stores, building memories.

Congrats on a race well run Tracy! You are awesome!

Hand Selector

I am not at the Catalyst Conference right now, but since my friend Tim Stevens and my uncle Joel Hunter are both speaking this year I thought I'd check out the Catalyst website.

When I got to the site I found something that made me extremely happy! There is a "hand selector" tool where you can choose what type of hands you want featured on the menu. Girl hands, harry man hands, feet hands and even cat hands. I love it. So hilarious!

Have you ever seen any other website with this feature?

Match-o-Matic II

I am a big advocate of voting. Perhaps you are having trouble deciding who you want to be President. Well, ABC News has offered to help.
The ABC News site has a fun little quiz called the Match-o-Matic II that will help you decide by pairing quotes from both candidates side-by-side and challenging you to pick the quote that you most agree with. At the end of the quiz, the candidate that you least agree with get's launched off the teeter totter. I was surprised how many quotes were not obvious on who said them. Try it for yourself!

I know who I'm voting for...do you know who you're voting for?

5-year Reunion

The big event, Saturday night at New Holland Brewery. Almost 100 class of 2003 graduates came to the reunion event! 97 of our classmates and their spouses were registered to attend and a hand full more just showed up! It was a great turn out and everyone seemed to have fun reconnecting with old friends, eating pizza and watching the slide show that was put together for our Senior Banquet 5 years ago. I love hearing about all the amazing jobs and lives that people have today. From news anchors to brainiacs writing mathematical software for the government, to moms with 3 kids! I was so busy talking to everyone that this was the only picture I took!I got to see a bunch of the girls that lived on my floor in Gilmore and connected live with some of my blogging friends as well. Tiece, Mindy and Jen all have great blogs that I read on a weekly basis...and they read mine too! We have all grown closer over the last couple of years in the blogosphere than we ever were in college and decided that we should actually hang out in person sometime soon!

All in all the reunion was a blast. Thanks for coming everyone! If you want to stay connected to some of your friends from Hope check out the 2003 Alumni Facebook group!

College Students

College students are so great! Ryan and I had some of the best years of our life so far while we were at Hope. When we're back on campus we think about how we felt 9 years ago walking to class, going to chapel, eating at Phelps, living with all of our friends. We saw Chris for about an hour on Saturday afternoon. He met us at Subs n' More for some lunch. He is a college student, he is great and Ryan and I couldn't be prouder of him!I also got to see my friends Kara and Courtney. They were campers the years that I was a counselor at Camp Adventure, and now they are students at Hope. It was so fun to see their rooms, meet some of their friends and I even got to help Kara a little bit with her hair before the homecoming dance. So fun to see you girls! You are great and I am so proud of both of you!

Alumni Soccer Game

Saturday morning we went to Hope for all of the homecoming festivities and to watch a bunch of our friends play in the Alumni Soccer Game. It was the perfect fall day, gorgeous weather, sunny but cool and the leaves have just started changing in Holland. I couldn't believe how many players were back from the years we were at Hope!

It was so fun to see everyone. I even got to see my friend Ed! He's still really good at soccer and even scored a goal.

Luke's dad Harry enjoyed giving Ryan some skiing techniques during the game. Harry took Ryan, Luke and Bryant skiing a few years ago and loves to recant the stories to Ryan and all of his friends.

Brooke and Tiegan were at the game to watch Tim. Tiegan will probably grow up to be a soccer star or something.